Is there anything more powerful in our lives than relationships? They can bring us to the heights of happiness and also to the pit of despair. Some are simple, some are very complicated. Every one of us must navigate our way through these rough relationship waters our entire life journey.

John Townsend, a nationally recognized expert and voice in this arena, joins The Sisterhood to offer his expertise on how we can do relationships better. From creating a life team, to discerning if a person is trustworthy, to learning how to ask for what we need, Dr. Townsend offers solid navigation principles.

This interview hits hard on the practical – – you will walk away with helpful ideas you can implement immediately with the people right around you.

Townsend Institute of Leadership Development

Boundaries

People Fuel

1 Peter 4:10 “We are the stewards of God’s manifold grace.”

The 4 Quadrants of Relational Nutrients:

Be Present – acceptance, containment, validation, comfort (not a lot of words, more eye contact and empathy)

Convey the Good – affirmation, belief, encouragement, respect, and hope, give me upward because I’m feeling downward

I’m watching you _______________

I can’t believe how hard you worked on _______________

I believe in you ________________

I respect that you’re doing a really hard thing by _________________

I can see a great future for you because I see you __________________

Provide Reality – clarify, feedback, help with focus, help me with my why

Prov.20:5 “A person’s heart is deep waters, but a person of understanding draws them out.”

Call to Action – challenge, steps for advice, provide a structure or path

Ask yourself, “what do I need from them? and what do they need from me?”

Click here to download the 22 relational nutrients

The 3 things that keep us from outsourcing other people: Pride, Rejection, & Shame

Brene Brown

The 7 C’s – evaluating people who are in our lives: Evaluate who is in your life right now through the lens of these descriptors.

Coach (mentor)

Comrade (on your team)

Casuals (potential comrades)

Colleagues (competent, relational, team player co-workers)

Care (giving to others without expecting anything back)

Chronics (people continually in crisis)

Contaminants (toxic people)

When Helping Hurts

QUOTES FROM THE EPISODE:

We cannot be fully loved until we are fully known.

Vulnerability leads to intimacy.

Life is messy, just love people.

There is a difference between a gift and competence. If you don’t feel you have the gift of ________________, work on getting better in that area.

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